VA Drabbles
by roza m belicova
Summary: The title says it all, drabbles surrounding the VA gang. Mostly Angst and Romance but feel free to send in prompts if you want!
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys so I hope you like this. I don't know if it's any good, but I'm trying to get back into writing and I've heard that drabbles are a good way to get the creative juices flowing so here goes nothing. Review and give me your thoughts, won't you?

Summary: Long distance could be hard, especially when problems arise. This is just a bit of Rose's angsty inner thoughts.

Replaceable.

Has it ever hit you, just how replaceable you actually are? Like have you ever just woke up one day and realized what you thought you had was just the universe's idea of a sick joke? Because I have and let me tell you, its not a pretty sight.

One day I had it all, then I went to bed and the next day it was all gone. He was my everything, my world, the love of my life. He was the one I could not see my life without, the one in who's eyes I saw my future.

And ok, so maybe it wasn't perfect, he did live in Russia and I lived in America, but it was damn near perfect to me. It was the closest I had ever gotten to perfect anyway, and if I was being honest, I didn't need perfect if I had him with me.

He was the one I wanted to put the work in for, the only one who knew exactly how to calm me, exactly how to ground me so that I didn't feel like I had to run, didn't feel like I had to be anyone other than myself. And when he looked at me, the look in his chocolate eyes could bring me to my knees.

Maybe this was something we could work out, god knew we had the connection for it, but for right now, he was gone, and I was being hit by exactly how replaceable I was. It wouldn't be difficult at all I knew. He was gorgeous. He could have anyone. But I wanted to be the one.

I hope you liked it! I don't have a particular theme for these yet, but y'all know I'm pretty good at angst! So, for right now, angst is what I can give you though it might change XD. Leave me some of your thoughts now guys, feel free to send in prompts and stuff if you want to, I'll be happy to write them!

XXX

Roza


	2. a mother's instinct

Hey guys! Thank you to those of you who reviewed, you guys are awesome and I love you all. You guys know this is my take on a drabble collection, so each chapter's going to be different, but I might just write something that follows up with that last chapter. Not this one though. This one was requested by Stella so here you go I hope you enjoy!

Summary: Janine has always been painted in a bad light because she left Rose to be raised by the academy, so let's take a trip inside her head!

Prompt: A mother's instinct.

Dropping my baby off at the academy when she was only five years old, was one of the hardest things I had ever had to do. It went against my every maternal instinct, but here I was, leaving her at the gates which would inevitably dump her into a life of danger.

I consoled myself however, with the knowledge that at least until she was 18, she would be safe behind these walls. And until she graduated, she would be cared for by Alberta Petrov, captain of the guardians at St. Vladimir's and, a longtime friend of mine. I wish someone would've told me though, that in doing so, I was leaving her to be raised by the academy as my job did not permit frequent visits and, by the time it did, she was already grown up and had formed her own opinion of me.

And still, leaving her at the academy was far easier than standing back and watching as my dreams of her being safe behind its walls shattered. In my desperate need to keep her safe from the harshness of the world and from her father's shady business, I'd forgotten that it was Abe Mazur's blood which ran through her veins. I'd forgotten that she would obviously grow up to be a rebel.

Perhaps it was a mother's instinct that had warned me that day, that had told me leaving her at the academy wasn't a good idea. Or perhaps that voice in my head had simply been my own doubts, and it was a mother's instinct that guided me to drop her off at St. Vladimir's, because even though I'd done it with a heavy heart, I would be lying if I said I wasn't proud of the woman my Rose had grown into. She was beautiful and capable. She bore the best traits of her father and myself, which made her a force to be reckoned with. And every time I saw the happiness that shone in her eyes when she looked at Dimitri or at Lissa, I knew I'd made the right decision all those years ago.

I hope you guys liked it! Remember to review and request prompts if you'd like!

XXX

Roza


	3. haunted

Thanks for the review's guys.

Prompt: Haunted

Summary: Promises are important to Dimitri, but it takes on a whole new meaning when he breaks one to his Roza. Kind of a follow up drabble to the first one.

I'd hurt her. That realization sat like a tun of bricks on my chest. I hadn't meant to, but I had anyway and I hated myself for it. My Roza was beautiful, she was kind, the definition of all that's good in this world. She was sure as fuck a lot more than I deserved, she didn't deserve what I gave her.

Aside from that, the reason this was eating me up so much was because I'd made her a promise. I promised her that I would make her happy always. I promised that I'd never hurt her and, yet, I had. I'd broken my promise and that was a hard as fuck pill to swallow. Granted it was unintentional, the distance wasn't something I could control, but what else was I expecting? She lived in America and I lived in Russia, of course it was bound to catch up to us.

She said she couldn't do it anymore, and I honestly didn't blame her. How could I when I knew exactly how she felt? I'm not going to lie, it terrified me that we weren't going to be able to work it out. Her face haunted my every dream, her smile made my heart flutter. She was my baby, the one I wanted to make it work for.

Sighing a bit, I set the novel down, I wasn't even reading it anyway, and got out of bed. It was time to go for my nightly run, the only way I ever managed to get any kind of sleep anymore. And I needed sleep, because my dreams were the only places that I saw her face now. Maybe it was time I got my shit together and call her up. Maybe it was time for a conversation.

Leave me your thoughts people I'd probably do another one because fucking long-distance relationships are hard as fuck…Shout out to anyone reading this and is in a long-distance relationship. I doubt there's anyone but feel free to correct me if I'm wrong in a review. Anyway, real life can be hard enough maybe I'll give these two a happy ending drabble style.

XXX

Roza


	4. Time heals

Hey guys seriously, thanks so much for all of your reviews on these drabbles. This is just one I needed to write; I hope you like anyway.

Prompt. Time heals.

Time heals has been something I'd been hearing my whole life. But I was starting to think that maybe that was just something people said to make themselves feel better. And I understood, because being a guardian meant we lost people often. But you see, there were some things, that no amount of time could heal.

Today marked three years since Mason, a good friend of mine left this Earth and that was putting it lightly since he'd had his neck snapped by a strigoi, the evil undead vampires which nightmares were made of. It still hurt like a bitch, that Mason-sized hole in my chest. So no, I didn't believe in time heals all. I believed that time made grief manageable.

I learned to breathe around the pain in my chest. The hole he left behind had become a part of me, another scar to match the ones my heart already bared. I learned to look back fondly on his memories, on all the times we got in trouble for doing something stupid together and all the dumb inside jokes that only we got. Or I could, on most days. But today wasn't most days.

Today, everything hurt. Today it felt as raw as it had in those early days. Today breathing was hard. I didn't want to do anything except staying in bed. And I could I realized, because I didn't have a shift until tonight. I'd find some way to get out of it when tonight rolled around, but for now I just pulled the blanket tighter around me and let the tears fall.

I'm not sure how long I laid there like that, but at some point, the front door had opened and Dimitri had entered. Moments later he'd crawled into bed with me. He didn't ask for an explanation; he just held me and rubbed my back while I cried. I clung to him; my face buried in his chest.

I didn't realize it until that very moment, but this was what I needed. I'd needed him, needed his arms around me. He had always grounded me in a way that no one ever had before, and it was no different now. His arms around me reminded me that I wasn't alone and made me feel safe enough that at some point I fell asleep.

That night I was able to get out of my shift. I was sure Lissa had something to do with it, seeing as how Hans told me that I'd either have to go with her majesty or report for duty. I really contemplated just working my shift, there was probably not going to be much to do anyway, but there weren't many people I trusted with Lissa's safety. So, I slipped on some black jeans and a black hoodie, left my hair down and trotted out to God knows where with her.

Little did I know that everything was going according to her and everyone else's plan. We ended up in one of the court's many gardens, this one secluded and almost at the edge of the wards. Someone, probably Lissa again had set up a cozy little picnic with all of our friends and Mason's favorite foods.

And I would be the first to admit that even though I'd wanted to stay in bed away from everyone, it felt good to be surrounded by all of my friends. We huddled together long into the night sharing licker and food, retelling stories about Mason and moments we all shared with him. Many tears were shed, but many laughs too and at one point when I looked up, I caught sight of his ghost just briefly. He shot me a smile as he lingered outside the wards, a happy, peaceful smile that instantly set me at ease. I leaned back against Dimitri's chest with the knowledge that at least he was ok.

Let me know your thoughts lovelies and feel free to send in prompts I'll be happy to write them

XXX

Roza


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